Along with the schedule of anthems for the first few months of the season, our choir director Charles usually composes a faux Bible verse, written in the style of the King James version, complete with reference to an imaginary book.
When we arrived for choir rehearsal Thursday night, the schedule awaited with this verse (which has been edited to protect the.. er... innocent).
And lo, it came to pass that the [nonprofit entity] laid siege yea even unto the sacred lodge in the Land of the [redacted] Lake, building up ramparts round about it so that the Righteous of [our home town] were thwarted in their attempts to assemble for the sacred gathering during the new season. But the Righteous, knowing that the LORD was on their side, and strengthened by the consuming of the Most Holy Breakfast Sausages of the Silver Creek, did taunt and mock the [nonprofit entity] with mixed nuts, crudité, finely chilled wines, and pre-made Margaritas, which confounded the [nonprofit entity]and threw them even into a panic so that they fell headlong into the [redacted] Lake, and were heard from no more. And seeing that the [nonprofit entity] were thus consumed by the waters, the righteous resumed their sacred work, drank coffee, and were refreshed in the faith.